Babe, I Think We’ll Be Okay

I quit my job today.

I haven’t physically written my notice yet as there are a few things I have to square away before I make my exit one of public news, but the feeling is mutual. I’m sorry I haven’t told you how I felt sooner since we’ve been seeing less of each other (thanks, work) but that is soon to change. It’ll be a welcomed relief to be at home at night yet I’ll be quite apprehensive of how home life is supposed to function. You know it’s been years since I’ve had a normal work schedule and I have some concern about micro aggressions that come with going to work (and coming home) in the same day with the same sunlight such as rush hour traffic and office politics. Again, you know I’ve worked either swing or the graveyard shift for the majority of my adult life – this obviously includes our entire dating relationship and marriage – so bear with me as I get adapted to a significant life change.

I think the only reasons why I haven’t made this happen sooner have been 1) health insurance for the family and 2) I don’t know how I would make it after toiling in a monotonous state for the past decade. We both know I’ve never really been much of a people-person and often too willing to go rouge for no other reason than to show the Man that he can be defied. Aside from becoming bored so stinking easily and the fact that merely surviving just isn’t cutting the mustard around here anymore, I don’t think I have anything else to prove at this role. Attendance? Come on, I’ve only missed one day in the last five years; it’s not exactly like the appraisals and raises have come annually nor am I appreciated beyond a trinket or backhanded compliment here and there.

I don’t know what my next more entails but it certainly has to be better than this dead-end on the wagon wheel of my working life. Ten years of working overnights has inflicted more damage than I could’ve ever expected.

In all honesty, I think we’ll be okay solely because of our faith in God.

I’m tired of having to tell our friends and family not to count us in their lives because I have to work this weekend.

Even with a couple of days off during those alternating weeks, it still feels like I haven’t gotten rest – and my health is beginning to show it.

I guess it would be one thing if the loot was enough to justify the conditions we reside in, but missing our child grow up is not an option.

I’ve never really cared for the job beyond the paycheck and even then, it was for the five minutes to figure out how quickly bills ate up two weeks’ of hard work in the control room.

No one expects to stay in one spot for five years only to remain the low man on the totem pole, but that seems to have occurred in this case. If there was a legitimate path toward advancement, I’m certain I would have taken it by now; despite how easy the job has become, ain’t no future in sitting on my bum staring at seven monitors and answering mundane questions about the materials received and run nightly.

Officially, this isn’t an “Eff You, I’m out” letter. That one is on a different flash drive than the one I prefer to use.

I mentally checked out at least two years ago and my body is finally following suit.

I quit my job today – and I know we’ll be okay.