2025 In Review

 Well, it's that time of year again where I recall some of the best - and worst - parts of the year. For those of you who have waited with bated breath for these words, here you are; for those of you who have never read one of the A Dollar and a Dream's Year in Review blogs, then welcome. God has looked out for all of us for one more year, and in truth, those words shall not be taken lightly nor the experiences that 2025 gave us.

So...how do we start?

JANUARY

Back to the obligatory black-eyed peas, pork (I smoked rib tips), cornbread, and cabbage to start off what I thought would become the Year of Momentum. Certainly, 2024 was a year of revelation of not only famous and infamous people but also it showed who some of our associates, coworkers, mutual friends in the virtual space and real world really are and what their values are. As minding my own Black-ass business continued to be more than a way of life, little did I know of the seismic shifts beginning to form underneath my feet.

It's Miller Time

Caeli and some of the then-fourth graders sung for the Bryant School Board at the monthly meeting. They did an amazing job!

FEBRUARY

Here is the return to one of my favorite times to spread knowledge on social media:  Black History Month. Although I hadn't sniffed a classroom in years, it remains necessary that Black achievements and history be highlighted in an environment that would love nothing more to suppress and/or outright dismiss the contributions of Black people not only in the news but also locally and within the diaspora. Congratulations to everyone who participated and shared each BHM post throughout the month in what may be the final Dub Shack BBQ sauce contest - and as I continue to evangelize that every day is a GREAT day for barbecue, shout out to the first repeat contest grand champion in Jessica, first place to Sylvia, second to the man Quantrell, and third to my folk Noel.

The Upward hooper had a birthday party at Autosave, and her fine mama kept her active throughout the month. 

Big up to our Reddie friend Tyanna for making Caeli's birthday cupcakes and cookies: If you're in Arkadelphia and haven't experienced them, you need to make Ty's Delicious Sweet Treats a must-purchase!

MARCH

The Year of Momentum was going swimmingly well until the end of the month. Keep reading and I'll share. 

What happened?

We linked up with Saint Mark Baptist Church in Little Rock on March 9, I gave my final goodbye to Mount Zion two weeks later on the 23rd, had an MRI in what turned out to be one of the biggest life-changing events ever, and in the midst of it all, made a pair of quick trips to the Memphis Zoo and the Crater of Diamonds for spring break to maintain a bit of normalcy for the three of us. Chunking the deuces to the Mount after twelve years was hard due to the ending of a season that saw not only my daughter's dedication ceremony but also my own ordination and the friendships and (hopefully) lifelong connections that will extend long after the ruts in the parking lot from cutting donuts are smoothed over; the wins and lessons learned from being in a leadership capacity; and the true costs of standing on business. 

On March 28, the matriarch of the King family - my grandma - entered eternity. Imagine what she had seen and experienced in 97 years on this rock. She is very much missed, and her passing came a few weeks after her brother passed away. For those who knew, thank you for your prayers. It is quite unfortunate when the only times we come around family is for weddings and funerals, and I know I've got to do better being present in the moment versus a mere physical appearance, so gird up those close to you a bit tighter. 

APRIL

I would say that the Year of Momentum halted except that it would be a fib, but it definitely shifted priorities and directions.

Remember the MRI I briefly glossed over? I ended up going in for a biopsy, and eight days later on April 18, found out that I had prostate cancer. Note the word "had." I previously mentioned that I was too tired to know my head from my ass to really take in the news from the night's shift, and thankfully Chastity was in the room when my urologist told us and as we formulated a plan to beat the beast in my body - and no, digging my head in the sand pretending that everything is OK was not an option. Planning my own homegoing was not an option given how quickly the cells spread: I would have been dead by now had I ignored it or even delayed treatment - and no, chemotherapy was not a choice. To recall that story, reread The Fight For My Life.

MAY

I also realized that I hadn't made a Dub Shack BBQ post until last month when I shared my Easter ham recipe - and oddly enough, I cooked more in those first seventeen days of the month than I did all year long. Because I was uncertain of how my radical prostatectomy would go, I smoked the fool out of any and everything I wanted to eat from pork butts, briskets, turkeys, chickens, dips, and yes, even grilled some vegetables plus a batch of brownies. Clearly, the hobby has always been a stress reliever and doubly so over that time - if you showed up at the house, you got something to eat. The real reason that I basically ran a restaurant from my backyard is that if something happened to me, Chastity and Caeli would be able to eat incredible barbecue from the friendly pitmaster. 

But before that, I lost my barber. Eric was the brother that everyone kept on the cool whose steady hand made sure I had the tightest beard and hair lines around, and as his body betrayed him, the need to tap in grew. Yeah, I've had dreads for four years, but there was/is nothing like pulling up at Stylemasters on a random Saturday morning, and now with Jack having the honor to maintain the Levert-like edge, I still look fresh some days - after my loc doctor finishes her work.

May 18 was the day the cancerous parts of my body was removed, and the beginning of seven weeks at the house recovering from the physical trauma. For much of it, I barely ate [I lost nearly forty pounds since], did my daily Kegels, walked up and down the street as much as I was able without tiring out, spent more time on the phone than any other point in years prior or since, and otherwise hurt like hell.

JUNE

One full month of not working and Chastity didn't want to kill me.

Yet.

Sure, the staying at home bit became monotonous quickly, and as I adjusted to carrying my work backpack with medical supplies for those just-in-case accidents or incidents, I had to consider that I was moving with a 15 lb. weight restriction:  Maybe that's why I smoked so much brisket and pulled pork prior to surgery. I learned to celebrate small wins such as going to the bathroom, creeping up and down the driveway, and yes, even climbing into the truck not to drive anywhere as much as to sit somewhere else other than the porch or in the blue lawn chairs out back. Thanks to Dad, Chastity, Alan, and Aston  for pushing full recovery and preventing me from picking up the wheelbarrow to haul cut tree branches and bushes to the curb, Jason and Michelle for mowing my weeds, Heath for staying down like four flat tires on a Box Chevy - the beer and cookies were the meal of champions, my Day One brother Jason for allowing me to pull up and grace his house one afternoon [this is the day I brought Dat White barbecue sauce to Conway], Caeli for being the best daughter on this side of eternity, and everyone for your prayers, conversations, and for being wonderful souls. 

Let me say this: Being tethered to a catheter sucked, but it was nothing like the pain induced by random spasms and leaving Vacation Bible School in tears due to said jabs.

However, I discovered that the day I needed to get out of my head - Juneteenth - was not a good day to find a random greasy spoon that served killer chili cheeseburgers in rural Saline County, and since I was wearing that t-shirt, hitting up the Sunoco a few miles down the road instead was a better solution. I don't think I found my burger fix since - I ate a patty melt from Whataburger instead.

But before I had to return to reality and night shift in the swamp, we did sneak in a quick vacation to Great Wolf Lodge in Grapevine. No, we did not eat at Goldee's or any of the hot barbecue joints in the DFW - there may be a partnership in the wings with my uncle, cousin, and one of their church members who slings ribs in east Garland that you'll have to stick around for. The girl indeed had fun at the resort, and for the first time in years, I got to see my cousins. 

Below is what came from some of those shenanigans with - and without - Fosters. Although there is no place like that house on Tensley that held fifty years' worth of memories, it was good being upright and in motion around them and their children.

JULY

Aye, motherf**ker!

Those two words are what greeted me back to work July 9, and for the crew, they got what was later termed as The Last Supper: enough barbecue to open a food truck with. While I won't divulge the details of the spread, it was pretty safe to say they ate really well. 

Here is an update about the swimmer:  Caeli killed it! 

She either won her heat or finished second in nearly every single event this season for the Sharks, and for all of the Ramen she consumed during the school year, it seemed like that was her secret weapon as she supercharged her way from one end of the pool to the other. Overall, she somehow just missed Swimmer of the Year for her age class. With the support of the village from birth, #CAELISTRONG was a true Tiger Shark hunting and devouring the competition plus growing more confident in herself and her abilities beyond leading the Fortnite or Minecraft brigades of fourth- and fifth-graders. I should feel ashamed of myself of her trash-talking skills but for some reason it is kind of entertaining. My only caveats:  Don't curse or say anything stupid or too revealing about her life. 

Healthwise, my PSA score was down to .01 which is to be expected for the prostate exiting the chat. The war hadn't been won yet, and one thing we found is that the cancer cells were confined to that one region. Back to rebuilding that pelvic floor...

AUGUST

Fourteen years of marriage.

Final year of elementary school.

Where has the time gone?

I'd rather have the time back than the bag we dropped on the Explorer from when the active grill shutters decided on a siesta instead of working on Interstate 30. At least that loaner Maverick was pretty cool for its size and livability: I could see the kid driving one to Bryant High as her first vehicle in a few years. Thanks to Southwest Ford for diagnosing the issue and Everett Ford for the actual repair plus a few other overdue items that the previous owner skipped over before trading it in. One year after getting rid of a Camry for it, the bus isn't that bad to tool around in. I'm still not the biggest Ecoboost fan, but at least the car has been trouble-free beyond the one thing.

SEPTEMBER

I flipped the switch - and not the pew, pew kind - to keep going at night. At this point, life has returned to a modified normal and as the bouts of depression waxed and waned, I found myself in the hometown to not only find my biological grandmother Bernice's gravesite but also initiate the steps in cleaning Grandpa and Grandma Beaulah's shared marker. 

For Grandparents Day at Collegeville, Caeli was surprised by her grandparents with lunch! 

Volleyball season began with tryouts, several new girls, and all of the pressure of the Volley Queens name as defending league champions. Though I did not share a season in review due to external circumstances beyond my control, the Final Dance made for a quite the journey. Coaches Chastity and Zac (I did not reprise my role as second assistant, only ball-getter and Caeli's Number One fan) worked at getting the ten Queens in the best playing space within their abilities and the eventual payoff. Interestingly enough, nearly half of the softball team Caeli had played for was in the league and I was impressed by their talent and teamwork.

OCTOBER

In a 48-hour period, I had received the worst and best news.

The bad:  My job was being eliminated courtesy of budget cuts by people who only viewed life by the Excel spreadsheets instead of the purpose of the gig. Without the possibility of severance pay or unemployment benefits, my own morale went down the toilet. I spent thirteen years working for an organization and barely missed work (I called off eight days in 13 years. Reread that twice) only to be disposed of like Tuesday's trash at the curb. If that wasn't a gut punch after all 2025 has been, then I had become desensitized to the violence.

The good: Matter of fact, we found out that I BEAT PROSTATE CANCER! 

Give God all of the praise for beating down that beast that tried to take me out. Of course, there are more routine appointments to make sure it does not spread elsewhere or make a return appearance anywhere as the survival rate is 97%. Considering the horrible news from the day before, I felt like nothing could stop me from a perpetual praise report! As for the cookout, it will happen quietly and in its own time:  Just know that there will be signs such as coolers full of Diet Dr. Pepper, Miller Lite, water, and a few other things to go along with the best neighborhood barbecue in town. 

As volleyball season progressed, the Queens ran off with the plug and their 8-0 start to what should have been an easy regular season title only for the girls to be derailed in the last week from a perfect record. Nevertheless, the calendar turned - and so did the after burners.

 We finally acknowledged being those middle-class parents with a trip to the pumpkin patch and getting closer to nature, farm life, and in the warm autumn sun with a few pumpkins to take home originally to carve but eventually became porch accessories. 

NOVEMBER

I switched into a different role at work and all I got was this lousy vest. 

But seriously, this thing is pretty dang warm if I say so myself. 

Like the past few years of coaching, Chastity got a win for her birthday plus sugar cookies and Mexican dinner for being herself. The playoffs this year during the quest for back-to-back titles were intense: Teams that the Volley Queens easily dispatched gave us all of the smoke, yet the girls prevailed nightly to the final goal of "not one, but two" trophies for winning the whole tournament again. Thanks not only to my way better half but also to Zac for the sideline work and choosing to run it back one more time. What's huge is for Caeli, Mila, and Kinslee is they are the benefactors of both crowns; for Paisli, Emery, Saphira, Gwen, Kaitlin, Destinee, and Rylee, know they are going to be some stars wherever they end up. It's pretty safe to say that the future is going to be bright enough to order a new pair of sunglasses.

VOLLEY QUEENS ON 3! 1, 2, 3!

Friends since '01, champs on this day

In the first Thanksgiving following Grandma's entrance into eternity, the family had a good time - and I threw on the deacon hat again for grace. Look, Saint Mark doesn't need me in that capacity; they have 26 deacons spread out among the nearly 8,000 members local and in the online community. Besides, I need to acclimate to the culture first. You'll find out which area I end up serving in sometime next year - and just chilling in the pews is not it. 

Back to Grandma and the rest of the Kings.

We wore our proverbial crowns to the kitchen and back a few times, some stashed plates and dipped out, others bellyached over the Cowboys, and one couSON (yeah, I said it and I mean it) hung out with us for a couple of days.

DECEMBER

We made it to the end of what was supposed to be the Year of Momentum. With those setbacks, 2026 gears to be the comeback in all of the ways. Consequently, it was not all for naught; we are all still here and for those who became ancestors like my friend and neighbor Tasha (she lived a few doors down from Mom and Dad, so that counts) and all who have departed this life that affected us directly in terms of his/her impact on our lives, we are grateful for their time and cherish the memories.

I noticed that I only did ten blog posts this year which is the fewest since 2012 when AD&AD was established. Maybe the living part got in the way of curating experiences, and maybe I'm somehow battling burnout.

Post-cancer, I've lost forty pounds and gone through all of the emotions and then some, and my wife is still putting up with me. Y'all pray that I don't send Chastity to the Saline County Courthouse with my tomfoolery and that 2026 goes a lot better for our household! 

God bless, I'm out.