Saturday, August 21, 2021

What Up?

In the everlasting quest of minding my own Black-ass business, I might as well tell you what’s been up.

Obviously, minding my own Black-ass business is the primary objective of 2021 and beyond but also what if I told you I was working hard at sanctifying my family’s privacy? It doesn’t mean that I won’t share opinions or mine the wells of knowledge with the most analytical takes of policy, local politics, sports, religion, and of course, barbecue – only that mental atrophy is a real thing and I needed to take better care of myself before people find themselves at my homegoing service throwing confetti and launching blue and gold balloons in the air.

Where shall I start?

1.     I got vaccinated for COVID. Before you go on a judgmental spiel about “who cares?”, here are my reasons:

a.      Chastity Armstrong.

b.     Caeli Armstrong.

c.      My parents aren’t spring chickens; therefore, they aren’t getting any younger. Dad has had a couple of major procedures done and I’m not about to be the guy whose callous behavior hastens his transition to the ancestors.

d.     My grandma is 94 years old: I love her. Period.

e.      Last October, I lost one of my closest friends from Henderson State when Karen passed away from Dat Damn Rona. To know what she means to me (and the rest of the crew), I would have to dig up the pictures or you can talk to any of us.

f.       A few of you may already know, but if you do not know, I am diabetic. Read Coming Out the Diabetic Closet - originally released July 2017 - for that story since I apparently won’t get around to ever sharing it.

g.     Was I skeptical about the Pfizer shots? Absolutely! I’m a Black man in America; after He-La, the Tuskegee Syphilis Experiment, eugenics, and countless instances of medical racism throughout American history, I would have been a complete fool for blindly trusting the science without my own critical research beyond what a few people have said on Facebook or YouTube or heard on Fox News, MSNBC, CNN, or the favored news source.

h.     I didn’t tell you because it is a decision for my family and only for the three of us.

2.     I’ve been back and forth in the lab making new barbecue sauces – try out Blue MF, Get Honey, or Block Party Pineapple, better known as BPP. All of the sauces are gluten-free, if you're wondering. *Since the original posting, Blue MF and BPP have been discontinued. Not every sauce is here for a long time but most definitely a good time.*

3.     Without speaking further of the church (note the lowercase c), let’s agree that I really like livestream services.

4.     In sanctifying my family’s privacy, I have minimized my own posts on social media including this very tome you are reading from. We know spring break in Myrtle Beach was a relative cost-effective way to go to the beach but what if I told you that it was more for the memories instead of the thirst-trapping so many people do back and forth to Atlanta or Dallas with little to nothing to show for it aside from overpriced retail goods and unnecessary crowds of overly basic people living for the ‘gram? Nothing against either city but the world is so much more expansive than two metropolises that define the South in 2021.


Minding my own Black-ass business is harder work than I anticipated.

After being reminded that some folks – even those with advanced degrees and larger bank accounts than my own – 1) lack serious critical thinking skills, 2) thoroughly enjoy tap dancing for Massa as if they won’t be forgotten one week after their own deaths, or 3) are so comfortable being hood rich in their own sorts of hedonism that trafficking in silence intimidates them, I found it best to let them meander in the mists of malarkey as they f**k around and find out the pricey penalties of their finesse attempts and casual bliss of ignorance.

Like the alliteration? I do too.  

I just put my English degree to good use for the first time this week.

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