Baby Makin' Project

By no means will I go into further detail about our situation, as it is personal. However, I found this article on msn.com and decided to share parts of it in a summary - and more humorous approach. The likelihood of a pregnancy can be affected by strange things not limited to the time and frequency you are having sex. Below are six things that are proven to help get knocked up - and hopefully not knocked out by the headboard breaking activities. 

1. Darkness. It turns out Teddy Pendergrass had a valid point when he told us to turn down the lights. Melatonin, the hormone which protects women's eggs from stress, is produced at night; if you're trying to get pregnant, it is recommended that you try to spend at least eight hours in the dark.
2. Raspberries. Men over the age of 44 should be taking in Vitamin C since those who do have 20 percent less damage to their sperm. For women, increased dosages of Vitamin C after conception decreases the risk of miscarriage. Raspberries are a great source since one cup contain 54 percent of your daily dose of Vitamin C. 
3. Brothers, Lose the Laptop. It's very important to avoid high temperatures on the genitalia if you want to conceive since heat could harm sperm. This means evading hot tubs as well as the laptops because you know they get hot. Lesson:  Your soldiers need to march without getting lost along the way, so find a table to work (or in this case, blog) from. 
4. Yoga. I love a woman in yoga pants, but she's gotta do it too. As much as the significant other - or future baby mama - likes to run marathons and body build, she should choose yoga over her more intense workouts. 55 percent of women who participated in fertility treatments as well as a ten-week mind-body course had a viable pregnancy.
5. Fall in love with fish. Studies have shown that omega-3s found in oily fish can reduce the risk of miscarriage and improve sperm quality. Before gettin' some, treat the special one to a salmon or tilapia dinner! Save the fried catfish for cookouts and some other time.
6. Acupuncture. The prickly procedure and herbal medicine have been used to treat certain fertility problems thanks to the potential improvement in ovarian and follicular function, according to American Pregnancy Association. Acupuncture can also improve blood flow to the endometrium. 

Good luck and keep the Jodeci on repeat!

Questions Religion Failed To Answer

This  is a series of tough questions that organized religion has failed to answer sufficiently. I'm certain you can Google all of the answers, but feel free to share the questions with your pastors. I do not profess to know the answers (nor any of them, for that manner), but hopefully this post can help answer those questions that would be otherwise left unasked. 

1. Why does the picture of Jesus on the front of the Bible not match the description of him in Revelation 1:14?
2. Why did they hide Jesus in Egypt? What color were the people in Egypt during the time? If you hide something it should blend right. 
3. What is the council of Nicea?
4. Who is Horus?
5. If everything of substance was taken away from a slave (reading, culture, language, etc.) why was Christianity allowed?
6. Who is the Black Madonna?
7. A) What two religious groups created the business of slavery? B) What are the two major religions that children of Africa belong to?
8. In the preachers’ Bible it says that there is no physical depiction of Christ. Why then do we allow pictures in the church and Bible?
9. How many chapters were in the original Bible? Where are those chapters now? What information was left out and why?
10. Why did the Moors give the secrets of alchemy to America’s Founding Fathers?

Ubuntu: Leading From Behind

Ubuntu – the idea that we are empowered by other people, and then we become our best selves through unselfish interaction with others

As I implicitly stated in the Leading From Ahead post, being an in-front leader is largely symbolic. How? Every movement, organization, set of ideas, or collective has at one time or another a physical face representing its core beliefs. If you don’t believe me, read this list:

• Earvin “Magic” Johnson is the man we think of when we hear about the Los Angeles Lakers greats, although Kobe Bryant is close. 
• President Barack Obama is the face the rest of the world looks to for aid, advice, and leadership. 
• For breast cancer survivors, Susan G. Komen carries significant weight. 
• Even the four-year-old son of a close friend has come to symbolize the objectives of Easter Seals in how he is able to represent that organization.

In basketball, everyone wants to be the hero making the last-second fadeaway jumper over an outstretched arm to win the game. The true greats, however, understand how to pass to others and let them take that shot for a team victory. Note: I did not say defer. I said PASS. Magic Johnson understood the team concept better than anyone else; without his deft passing skills and ability to guard all five positions on the floor, the Showtime Lakers were able to win five world championships in the 1980s. To get the best out of a team, make sure the members are able to reap the glories of victory and more importantly, let them feel like they are influencing the decisions. 

Contrary to what certain politicians think (read: John Boehner, Eric Cantor, Tim Griffin, and right-wing news media), leading from behind is not always a sign of weakness. I’ll share a shepherd’s parable:  When you want cattle to move in a certain direction, you stand at the back with a stick. Convince the cleverer cattle to go to the front to move in the direction you want them to go. The others will follow the more energetic cattle, but really you are leading from behind. The idea of leadership is at its most fundamental core about moving people in a certain direction – usually changing the direction of thinking and actions. Unlike taking the megaphone “follow me!” approach, we empower others to move ahead of us through imparting our ideas and leadership by nudging them. One example of this leadership is Wal-Mart’s Open Door Policy which any associate can speak with a member of management about any issue concerning performance or a life issue. The associate comes away with ways to impact the company at a grassroots level, or at the very least, feels satisfied airing grievances to a supervisor or manager. Another example worth citing is at home:  parents would call family meetings (rare for us) to guide children for sensible rules and behavior versus strictly laying down the law. 

People of this caliber do the following:
• Putting in the work to truly understand things and examine issues from all sides
• Utilizing the better-qualified people in their circles, and learn from them
• Asking questions to clarify process
• Becoming allies with your team
• Learning to defer to others to increase their allegiance to them
• Listening, summarizing, molding opinions, and steering people in the right direction

Leading from behind is not the worst brand of leadership we can show; not leading effectively after being provided with all of the necessary tools to succeed is a far more damning fate. While leading from ahead clearly articulates a face to the message, those who activate the masses often remain behind the scenes,  as they are the ones who impact change.

This completes the two-part Ubuntu series of leadership. I'm glad you took the time to read to read both posts, and if you haven't done so, check out yesterday's post Ubuntu: Leading From Ahead.  

Ubuntu: Leading From Ahead

Ubuntu – the idea that we are empowered by other people, and then we become our best selves through unselfish interaction with others. 

During our days in elementary school, everyone wanted to be the line leader yet the teacher had a preselected list of which students performed the role for that week. The line leader was the student who got to lead his or her class to morning activity, received a hot lunch first, drink from the hallway water fountain, and be the first to the bathroom. While other students held varying roles as helpers (pencil sharpener, bathroom monitors, door holders, etc.), no other child felt as proud as the line leader. Because of my surname, I was frequently the line leader whenever we had a substitute teacher: It was easier for her to line all of us up in alphabetical order than to continue our beloved educator’s routine. The major sticking point we learned from those days is that good leaders not only lead, but also they are seen leading the way. 

Leading from ahead does involve risk taking in its job description. Not everything we do is guaranteed for success; we sometimes trip over our own feet into a lemon meringue pie in front of our contemporaries or say the wrong thing at an inopportune moment. For example, Nelson Mandela took his job description of leader literally when he stepped to the front of the line of prisoners entering Robben Island under stares and taunts of the guards to show the other inmates how to react. His message:  Stand up for yourselves. As evidenced from Mandela’s stand, leading from ahead also means doing things that do not necessarily attract attention. It does not allow us to accept special privileges; instead it keeps us grounded by performing the same tasks as the followers. In other words, nothing is beneath a leader. More importantly, seize the initiative to stand out – even if no one else understands the vision appearing before our eyes. In the religious community, that is called stepping out on faith. We may not know where the journey will take us, but we believe that the reward is precisely one we have sought after. 

A core principle in leading from ahead is remembering not to let our colleagues fall too far behind. Snoop Dogg once eloquently stated “ain’t no fun if the homies can’t get none.” We need to include our angel investors to confer with them and confirm (or reaffirm) their commitments toward our common goal. Notice I did not say closest confidants, as some of them want to be up close and personal when we fall. At times, real leadership may require us to negotiate with our opposition, opening us to calls of betrayal all in the name of problem solving. President Abraham Lincoln is legendary for his team of rivals – his Cabinet consisted of both Republicans and Democrats who primarily operated not in the name of the United States of America, rather their own self-serving ideologues – to preserve and restore the Union post-Civil War. His leadership from the front meant that he was accountable for all of the successes in addition to the failures. By owning the decisions made, we knew who to blame if wins did not materialize.

Part II of Ubuntu continues with the next post. 

Bravery

Cowards die many times beforr their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
Of all the wonders that I yet have heard
It seems to me most strange that men should fear,
Seeing that death, a necessary end,
Will come when it will come.

(Julius Caesar, Act 2, Scene 2)

GTFO: Creating The Exit Strategy

Sick of what you're doing? Short of simply walking away or forcing a termination,  most of us have to come up with a way out that minimizes the pain inflicted with an eventual departure from a role.  Obviously, yelling "forget you" on your way out only yields a quick satisfaction and a long-term relationship destroyed. Below are some tips for chunking up the deuce to a lousy situation without losing hard-earned credibility:

1. Determine what it is you want to gain from the new job, assignment, or experience. No one wants to jump in one frying pan to another without a real plan.

2. Define what success looks like to superiors and as best as you can figure it out, how long it takes to demonstrate said success with some consistency. To some managers, success is having a dependable workforce, while others would prefer people to ask questions and become lifelong learners. Each company is different, so inquire before jumping into the aforementioned frying pan.

3. Try to gain an understanding up front from your superiors how long they expect you to remain in this role before being considered for promotion, assuming you are exceeding expectations. By knowing this, you have a baseline to work with and if forward progress is possible much less required.

4. Create a timeline, allowing for a 9- to 18-month buffer based on your expectations and feedback from your superiors,  on which when you should be moving on to your next role. (Depending on company culture, it could be two to four years.) If you're able, be patient picking up the full scope of your role; otherwise, this may not be for you.

5. Detail what your actions will be for the new role, promotion, or assignment does materialize within that time frame. For example, working with search firms, monster.com, and attending professional-level career fairs are all ways to implement your plan.

6. If the time frame is exceeded, implement exit strategy. Don't stay so long you become outdated.  Your time and gifts are worth more.

Many of us would be grateful to take the LeBron James approach to protecting his brand and managing his exit strategy. By learning from 2010 what mistakes he made, his return to Cleveland - albeit a significantly wealthier one - he has not only mastered the exit strategy, but by knowing his value, he has empowered the people in his circles to greater heights. Know when it is time to get out before you are pushed out.

We Will Treasure Our Memberships

Don't store up treasures on earth! Moths and rust can destroy them, and thieves can break in and steal them. Instead, store up your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy them, and thieves cannot break in and steal them. Your heart will always be where your treasure is. Matthew 6:19-21