Father's Day 2013 Thoughts & Tribute

father (fah ther) - a male parent; progenitor; a person who originates or establishes something' paternal protector or provider; a man who exercises paternal care over others

Every third Sunday in June, we celebrate our fathers by giving them their own day - and honoring the man we call dad, pop, daddy, father, paw, pa, pappy, etc. in our own unique ways. Traditionally, dads usually receive a myriad of gifts such as neckties, another hammer, grillmaster apron, a free trip to a random Sunday buffet, new electronics, and so forth as a small token of thanks to the man who is one-half of how we got here and who we inevitably become. As fathers, these men are more often than not overlooked by our culture as little more than modern-day buffoons if not sports-crazed workaholics who seem to constantly bark commands to the progeny of which we know is nothing further from the truth. While they would like to spend some time watching the US Open, NASCAR, the NBA Finals, what our fathers would definitely prefer is to be loved and appreciated. Without the male seeds, how can the world properly function?

Since I don't have my own physical children (yet), I simply sit remember the lessons my dad taught and entrusted me in the event that I do get to be the first role model for a child. From seeing him in the mornings, I know it was hard work! The blessing is twofold: by being there, we not only saw the man every single day and night, but also picked up some great memories. When we were in Scouts, dad would come home worn out from a hard day's work to help us make some of the most aerodynamic Pinewood Derby cars in the history of our pack just from showing him a picture of the car from either a poster or Hot Wheels toy, and two or three weeks later, we would crush the competition. If that's not legendary, then I don't know what is. 

Thank you to my own father, Mr. Kenneth R. Armstrong for everything I've learned over the past 34 1/2 years and all of the memories - and forcing me to grow up the rest of the way. Now that you're a grandfather to Aston, let's see how Alan passes those lessons to Aston. One day, I'll get my crack at it.

Thanks to my brother K. Alan Armstrong for taking care of my nephew. What was a sibling rivalry is now a complementary thing; if Astro even gets half of the memories we did growing up, he's had a heckuva childhood. It's not so much #weallwegot now, but more of being dad (and in my case, uncle). Keep up the super work.

Thanks to my male cousins who are raising kids in their unique situations as married men, single fathers, and even post-divorce. Keep holding down manhood.

Thanks to my bonded brothers for sharing some of their kids' moments with me; as a friend, I'm eternally grateful for that. Your styles may eventually shape how I raise my future ones. 

Thanks to my former students who sometimes looked at me as a role model. I know Mr. Armstrong got on your last nerves, but after being out of the classroom the past year, I do appreciate the relationships we were able to cultivate in addition to being your (favorite) English teacher. 

Thanks to my nephews Joshua and DeShawn for proving that I can do this. I want you both to keep pushing and become real men in a cold, cold world. If there is anything your uncle can do short of spending a boatload of cash, you know I'm there. Period. Of course, turning pro would be a huge help though I'd rather send you out there as balanced, quality men.

Thanks to all of the men I missed, the truly unsung brothers out there. The guys locked up in jail cells, the brothers who have to work extended distances from home, the men who are unable to cherish their babies due to child support issues not limited to visitation rights, the ones we see in Sunday best in our churches, etc. you are appreciated. As I misquote 2Pac, you're appreciated even if no one else cares. 

Grown Up Faith

A Grown Up Faith, James 1:1-4

Many people speak their minds in the manner of being full grown, grownup without recourse of consequences. Some children are more mature than many adults, yet adults have a Peter Pan disorder while the child is more composed. In the church, some people have been there so long that they think they are grown when they are still relying on milk. Meat is good for your nourishment. You are never too old to learn!

Whatever God has for you is intended for you! Therefore, stand unabashed as a loyal servant to Him. Be proud of the position you're given - and always have an ear piqued toward hearing what thus saith the Lord.

A prime example of being disconnected is attending a high school class reunion after so many years. After 10 years away from CHS, I quickly learn that not everyone is on the same page nor travelling in the same linear direction.

1. Addressed as brethren, those of you who are saved to remain wary of the upcoming troubles. To curb it, you MUST have a positive outlook on life. How? Your thinking must reflect the direction not from whence you come, rather where we advance. Not all trouble is negative; often, situations present themselves as a challenge. How we respond is what determines if we are truly grown up or if we still have childish faith.

Grown up faith requires patience. While it is easy to run at the first sign of trouble, it takes a certain level of maturity to breathe. It's not the end of the world; Fabolous and Toni Braxton both remind us to breathe again in so many words. Patience is a virtue with a perfect worth - the things that once bothered you should now be of no concern. You should be able to stand on faith when everything is crumbling around you. 

Superhero In Need

Whatever trouble you were going through, your problems were gone when the hero came around. Remember Darkwing Duck, GI Joe, Ghostbusters, Batman, etc? We have a great high priest as our superhero in God. Jesus came to save his people - who can say Buddha, Confucius did come back? - the Word is quick, a sword.

All you have to do is stop and pray to power up to become a different being. You have to know how to defend the struggles out there. You don't give a recovering alcoholic a bottle of Crown to hold til you get back or lend an addict five dollars for food if you know he's going to get a hit instead.  Like Mario after he eats mushrooms, touches a star, frog suit, winged suit, or leaf, you will change up.

To further expand the thought, visit Ephesians 6:10-19 to understand the whole armor of God. Every day is a test to get it right, give thanks for the good and bad. We need Him every hour.

Is Christ your superhero?

Quick Announcement

Quick Announcement:  If you ever need any business documents created for your personal records or company, give me a shout. I do great work for a very reasonable fee - that includes endorsements, proposals, grants, manuals (white papers and all), websites, etc. I'll post samples of each in the coming days, but trust me on this. Questions? Email me at either cedteaches@gmail.com or adrianwrites@yahoo.com so we can get started!

Now back to your normal Saturday.

i worry

i worry constantly
i worry over why we cant we just pay the damn bills on time for once
i worry that i may never be able to find a good job that provides a comfortable existence for us
i worry that we'll never be able to have children
i worry that my wife will say "fuck it, i'm gone" and leave me with nothing
i worry about losing my job as boring as it is
i worry that i'll never be truly independent
i worry about my car breaking down and not being able to repair it
i worry that my zeal of knowledge is dimming daily to a flicker
i worry about not being good enough after all these years
i worry that we'll be living in that crummy-ass apartment thirty years from now
i worry about becoming complacent with a monotonous existence. wait, i'm already there
i worry about rejection. after all these years, you'd think i was used to it by now
i worry that i'll have to go back to school and be a miserable failure with more debt
i worry that i'll die owing more that what i am worth
i worry that i've spent so much time working that i've missed out on life and it'll be too late to make up for it
i worry constantly

Finally Grown The F**k Up

I know what you're thinking when you read the title, and I can explain that. If you're not buying it, then f**k you too. That should be all of the profanity I use in this post.

How did I realize (after nearly 34 1/2 years) that I have finally grown up? Was it getting married? What about caring to know that my wife relies on my sometimes unspoken direction, even if she knows deep down inside that she is right? Or even getting our house? Let's not forget the unforeseen children God may bless us with one day down the road? For me, I think it was a combination of things that have happened in said 34 1/2 years of life on Earth. We all know my days haven't been exactly linear in direction, as some were beyond my circumstances and control and others were the end results of my mistakes. Sometimes I even did the right things and had to rely on faith more often than not!

One discovery in realizing that I had finally grown up was having to take care of two of my nephews while my sister-in-law was supposed to be getting back on her feet. It also showed how much I could do/take on very little sleep and be able to manage our primary systems at the job. The last thing you want to do is keep a twelve- and a ten-year-old inside the house because I was unable to score them a little bit of playtime after finishing their homework. As much as I love Joshua and DeShawn, I was happier when we got our pad back to ourselves; trust me, the boys are fine.

Another one comes from my wife herself. I met Chastity at our alma mater Henderson State many moons ago, and what she remembers in 1997 versus what you see now in 2013 are two vastly different people. I won't say improved, but different. Had I not evolved, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have thought about dating, let alone marrying me. After knowing each other for nearly sixteen years, it's pretty safe to say she knows me. I'm able to have fun and remain a bit serious when I need to, but the greatest thing is that she's got my back no matter what.

My journey in being a grown man has obviously not ended since there are so many teachable moments out there - seen and unseen - but I do feel better about it daily. Being an adult means a lot more than your age; it symbolizes the point of being able to prioritize and yes, putting away those childish things we all have read in our Bibles from 1 Timothy 13:11. Gone are the days of the candy paint, Fosgate stereo systems, repping my A Phi O, and trying to sleep with every woman walking; manhood puts a new perspective on certain things. This is why I don't understand why some folks do all they can to chase a fleeting memory. Sure, 21 was a wonderful year, but if I didn't learn better, then I'd likely be immersed in being a drunken frat boy who chased more tail than a deer hunter during open season. It's just a matter of being able to realize the seasons our lives are in (spring, summer, fall, winter).

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The Greatest Love of All, Part II

Mark 12:31

God set His agenda forth in this series, verses 24-31. For example, He declared marriage as one man and one woman in Genesis 1-3, 5. We are to be fruitful and multiply, proving He is the author and finisher of our faith. Be holy because He is holy.

Our society pushes their wants to justify sins. If we are using gay marriage as a platform when people say we love each other and want to raise kids, does it mean that it is ok when people want to be polygamous (one man, several wives) or bestiality (man loves animal).

The second commandment is to love your neighbor as thyself. If a man hits you, the first instinct is to knock the taste out of his mouths. God is trying to get us to a place where self-denial is where we ought to be. We still have a worldly tendency to recognize the people that share reciprocity towards us. Love 'em no matter what! Love the person, not their sins. If you really want to love God, deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow me!